Random Perverted Crap
Dec. 2nd, 2007 07:31 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
savioursephA couple of random things I wrote for kink memes, as well as Sarah's surprise birthday fic :)
Warning: completely stupid & often gross and disturbing :D
Shad/Zelda - 'blindfold'
She groped tremulously in the darkness so willingly imposed on her, having a vague idea what she would find, but not where. Her hands met naught but air for so long she was about to give up, when she made contact with... something? She cupped her hands gently around the warm bundle of flesh at her fingertips, kneading softly, feeling it raise upward & hearing a soft warbling moan. Zelda took it into her mouth, sucking gently at her prize. To be honest, Shad was seriously in need of a wash down there - it wasn't the most pleasant bouquet, really. Still, she persevered, taking the whole of it's mass into her mouth. Damn, it was thick! Such an interesting shape too!
"Err... Zelda?"
"Mmph?"
"While I'm sure Ooccoo is enjoying her tonguebath, I'm not particularly sure that was your intention."
"MMPFFFLFTHFTHLF!!!"
Din/Link - 'by the light of the fire/doggy-style'
With her strong flaming arms, Din cultivated Link's passion, searing brutal stripes into the boy's sides as she held him in her grip, thrusting her metallic crotch towards his. Of course, being nothing more than a glowing airborne statue she was without a vagina, so this was rather pointless, but Link seemed to be enjoying the feel of metal against cockflesh so she carried on regardless.
Meanwhile, the oracle of seasons finished buckling the strap-on and grabbed the charred boy from behind, penetrating his tight virgin ass and pounding mercilessly until he was moaning like a whore and rivers of cum flowed onto the other Din's near-molten body, putting out her all-creating flame in a violent hiss and a mass of steam.
Tingle/Link - 'asphyxiation & feather-play'
Link was crushed into the cheerful red balloon face-first as the rotund middle-aged man thrust voraciously into his behind, giggling maniacally and throwing confetti around like it was going out of style. The combination of rubber and bits of paper afforded him little room to breathe, but this just added to the pleasure as far as he was concerned.
Tingle eased off the barrage of over-enthusiastic fucks and Link was surprised by a tickling sensation, as something soft and fluffy was brushed teasingly down his back, and then Link screamed as the deranged man-child shoved the squalling cucco straight into his ravaged ass and got back to business., coming in a feathery flood down the inside of Link's thighs.
Goron/Link - 'penetration through the ocular cavity'
Link screamed in agony as the rocky protrusion burst through his eyeball, sending gloppy rivers of blood and vitreous humour down the youth's alabaster cheek. He would never have agreed to this had he known the intricacies of the gorons' mating process - he figured it would be the same as any other he'd encountered, just a bit grittier. The thrusts quickened, bashing mercilessly against the fragile rim bone that was the only thing keeping it from his brain, but it was a meagre defense, and with one final, orgasmic thrust the goron breached it easily, and Link felt no more, slumping to the ground in a blooded heap.
The goron stood over his dead mate dolorously, wondering what he had done wrong, as one of his compatriots came up behind him, timidly tapping him on the shoulder.
"Err... not sure how to tell you this, but... that wasn't his ass."
"Oops..."
Rusl/Uli - 'spicing things up'
Uli screamed in pain as the capsaicin-laced penis thrust mightily into her butt, although her cries were all but drowned out by those of Rusl, owner of said penis. What was her idiot of a husband thinking? This was not what she meant by "spicing things up a bit"! He could make swords - what was to stop him from forging some form of strap-on? Why did it have to be chillies of all things? Come to think of it, how did he get hold of chillies in the first place - it's not like he could go to the Faron Woods branch of Wal-Mart.
But anachronistic fruit aside - how was she supposed to bear this pain for much longer? How was he bearing it either? She had a terrible thought - what if all this pain means he'll never come? We'll be fucking forever!
Zelda/Anon - 'gloryhole'
She tried so hard to keep her secret from the world. Admittedly, at 8 or so inches, it was a pretty big secret to keep hidden, but Zelda did her best - refraining from the usual princess business of hunting down suitors like a rabbit tied to a giant biological clock in lieu of the whole "have weird dreams, tell guys cosplaying as elves about them so they can laugh" deal - hell, it kept her busy if nothing else.
But she was still a woman (of sorts) - she still had needs! And so, every night she would go down to the market, stripped of all that made her princessy - the rubber boobs were wrapped with care and hidden in her dresser drawer, the tape that hid her sizeable manhood discarded, her feminine features hidden well beneath a white silken wrap.
And in the public conveniences, behind the Happy Mask Shop, Zelda would recieve the only carnal pleasure she could, illicit and anonymous, as an unknown stranger shared her secret unknowingly.
Telma/Shad - 'his first b(l)owjob'
The shovel-faced feline made her way stealthily across the room towards her mistress and the man entwined between her legs. What was she doing to Shad? Could the poor man even breathe? He did seem to be enjoying it though - he must've done something really good for Telma to treat him like this. Maybe she should show her appreciation too?
Shad felt a new sensation - rough and tingly, as Telma did... something. He didn't know exactly how she was doing it - all her extremities seemed otherwise occupied - but damn, did it feel good? And it continued, ever stronger and ever rougher - Shad could barely keep himself from coming for even a few seco...
Louise hissed and walked away in disgust, once-fluffy fur now clumped together with something she'd rather not even think about. Honestly, humans are disgusting!
Miles/Phoenix - 'burning to death'
"Just let me get that for you, Wright."
Edgeworth took out a lighter from his pocket and burned the stray thread away from the back of the jacket, unaware that the garment in question was made of cheap rayon and equally unaware of the giant warning label stitched into the lining. So it was quite a shock to say the least when Phoenix gave an almighty shriek and he turned to see him so resembling his namesake bird, running around the room like a motorised bonfire and flailing his arms wildly in a futile attempt to quell the blaze.
Seeing what he had done, Edgeworth quickly removed his own jacket and threw it at Phoenix, trying to smother the flames. But in his blind panic the other man knocked the coat flying with his burning arm, only managing to set it alight too and thusly the curtains upon which it landed.
The fire eventually relented (on it's own - Miles' valiant attempts at stopping it having no effect). Phoenix had collapsed to the floor long before this, but the wall of flame created by the bottle of cheap whiskey on the desk had prevented his rescue. Edgeworth approached the other lawyer to examine the damage. It was bad.
Very bad.
He reached for the phone, but only managed to dial '9' before an arm rose from the ashes on the floor and stopped him.
"Miles?"
"Yes? Are you OK? Oh my God I'm so sorry!"
"Why didn't..."
"Yes?"
"Why didn't you... just pull it off?"
Marluxia/Vexen - 'sounding'
The blood and crushed petals combined in a sickly sweet attar that covered the rose-haired man's delicate hand as he pushed, pushed against the screams of pain/pleasure, pushed regardless of the freezing pain in his shoulders as Vexen gripped, seething in agony/ecstasy as the thorny stem ran through him, slashing, shredding what lay in it's path.
"No...! Stop...please! Uhhh!"
The younger man grinned sadistically, twisting the gory remains of the flower sharply and silencing the scientist with a brutal kiss. Obviously Vexen was enjoying it - he was still as hard as the moment he entered the room. Of course, some of the plants laying around were known for their intense aphrodisiacal properties, but that was irrelevant. What mattered was that they were having fun; consent was a minor point.
The muffled cries having all but abated, he wondered what he could do next. The rose was embedded as deep as possible now; no way he could get it in further, and nothing would make him break this moment off. In a flash of inspiration he gripped tighter and pulled, tearing the blossom free in a sickening flood of gore, the blond erupting in one final scream as he collapsed to the bed.
Noticing the older man had passed out Marluxia ended the kiss, now trailing down the older man's chest seductively with his tongue, melting the frost where he'd lost control of his powers. He rested in the blood-matted nest of hair at the base of the now-limp cock. He couldn't leave it like that - such a thing could never go to waste! He tenderly lapped at the other man's groin, taking in the craze-inducing taste of blood, rose petals and Vexen's own inimitable musk. This was what he craved, what he would go to any length to get. These encounters with the man who despised him were what made his hollow mockery of an existence worth suffering.
ReDead/Link - untitled (Sarah's Birthday Fic)
Link broke from his paralysis and stared into the hollow eyesockets, felt the dead breath of the withered monster enclose his face in a sickeningly cold nebula of putrescence and dank, lonely death. Papery, desiccated skin brushed roughly against him, the creature's bony arms in a painful deathgrip around the base of his neck. From his past encounters with ReDeads, he knew what to expect - first came the hugging and the laboured breaths; next came the biting and the struggling. But this one made no move to bite - rather it pulled itself closer, drowning him deeper still in the spoiled-meat stench it exhaled and pressing it's hard, wrinkled remains against him, rubbing; up and down, up and down. And then, although it didn't seem possible, Link emitted a soft groan as the creature's movements brought blood rushing to his cock, straining the fabric at his crotch to bursting point. He reached down to free his length, raw skin rubbing deliciously against the creature's clammy body. And then the skin of it's groin gave way, and Link was engulfed in the ReDead, pounding mercilessly into it's dried out husk of a body, moaning harder still as the monster joined him, both rising and falling together as their bodies spasmed and Link came in a powerful wave of ecstasy, his release bringing long-forgotten moisture to the creature surrounding him. And with that the ReDead finally released it's grip, sinking down to it's usual slump and turning, pulling free of the hero's softening member to seek new prey.
Warning: completely stupid & often gross and disturbing :D
Shad/Zelda - 'blindfold'
She groped tremulously in the darkness so willingly imposed on her, having a vague idea what she would find, but not where. Her hands met naught but air for so long she was about to give up, when she made contact with... something? She cupped her hands gently around the warm bundle of flesh at her fingertips, kneading softly, feeling it raise upward & hearing a soft warbling moan. Zelda took it into her mouth, sucking gently at her prize. To be honest, Shad was seriously in need of a wash down there - it wasn't the most pleasant bouquet, really. Still, she persevered, taking the whole of it's mass into her mouth. Damn, it was thick! Such an interesting shape too!
"Err... Zelda?"
"Mmph?"
"While I'm sure Ooccoo is enjoying her tonguebath, I'm not particularly sure that was your intention."
"MMPFFFLFTHFTHLF!!!"
Din/Link - 'by the light of the fire/doggy-style'
With her strong flaming arms, Din cultivated Link's passion, searing brutal stripes into the boy's sides as she held him in her grip, thrusting her metallic crotch towards his. Of course, being nothing more than a glowing airborne statue she was without a vagina, so this was rather pointless, but Link seemed to be enjoying the feel of metal against cockflesh so she carried on regardless.
Meanwhile, the oracle of seasons finished buckling the strap-on and grabbed the charred boy from behind, penetrating his tight virgin ass and pounding mercilessly until he was moaning like a whore and rivers of cum flowed onto the other Din's near-molten body, putting out her all-creating flame in a violent hiss and a mass of steam.
Tingle/Link - 'asphyxiation & feather-play'
Link was crushed into the cheerful red balloon face-first as the rotund middle-aged man thrust voraciously into his behind, giggling maniacally and throwing confetti around like it was going out of style. The combination of rubber and bits of paper afforded him little room to breathe, but this just added to the pleasure as far as he was concerned.
Tingle eased off the barrage of over-enthusiastic fucks and Link was surprised by a tickling sensation, as something soft and fluffy was brushed teasingly down his back, and then Link screamed as the deranged man-child shoved the squalling cucco straight into his ravaged ass and got back to business., coming in a feathery flood down the inside of Link's thighs.
Goron/Link - 'penetration through the ocular cavity'
Link screamed in agony as the rocky protrusion burst through his eyeball, sending gloppy rivers of blood and vitreous humour down the youth's alabaster cheek. He would never have agreed to this had he known the intricacies of the gorons' mating process - he figured it would be the same as any other he'd encountered, just a bit grittier. The thrusts quickened, bashing mercilessly against the fragile rim bone that was the only thing keeping it from his brain, but it was a meagre defense, and with one final, orgasmic thrust the goron breached it easily, and Link felt no more, slumping to the ground in a blooded heap.
The goron stood over his dead mate dolorously, wondering what he had done wrong, as one of his compatriots came up behind him, timidly tapping him on the shoulder.
"Err... not sure how to tell you this, but... that wasn't his ass."
"Oops..."
Rusl/Uli - 'spicing things up'
Uli screamed in pain as the capsaicin-laced penis thrust mightily into her butt, although her cries were all but drowned out by those of Rusl, owner of said penis. What was her idiot of a husband thinking? This was not what she meant by "spicing things up a bit"! He could make swords - what was to stop him from forging some form of strap-on? Why did it have to be chillies of all things? Come to think of it, how did he get hold of chillies in the first place - it's not like he could go to the Faron Woods branch of Wal-Mart.
But anachronistic fruit aside - how was she supposed to bear this pain for much longer? How was he bearing it either? She had a terrible thought - what if all this pain means he'll never come? We'll be fucking forever!
Zelda/Anon - 'gloryhole'
She tried so hard to keep her secret from the world. Admittedly, at 8 or so inches, it was a pretty big secret to keep hidden, but Zelda did her best - refraining from the usual princess business of hunting down suitors like a rabbit tied to a giant biological clock in lieu of the whole "have weird dreams, tell guys cosplaying as elves about them so they can laugh" deal - hell, it kept her busy if nothing else.
But she was still a woman (of sorts) - she still had needs! And so, every night she would go down to the market, stripped of all that made her princessy - the rubber boobs were wrapped with care and hidden in her dresser drawer, the tape that hid her sizeable manhood discarded, her feminine features hidden well beneath a white silken wrap.
And in the public conveniences, behind the Happy Mask Shop, Zelda would recieve the only carnal pleasure she could, illicit and anonymous, as an unknown stranger shared her secret unknowingly.
Telma/Shad - 'his first b(l)owjob'
The shovel-faced feline made her way stealthily across the room towards her mistress and the man entwined between her legs. What was she doing to Shad? Could the poor man even breathe? He did seem to be enjoying it though - he must've done something really good for Telma to treat him like this. Maybe she should show her appreciation too?
Shad felt a new sensation - rough and tingly, as Telma did... something. He didn't know exactly how she was doing it - all her extremities seemed otherwise occupied - but damn, did it feel good? And it continued, ever stronger and ever rougher - Shad could barely keep himself from coming for even a few seco...
Louise hissed and walked away in disgust, once-fluffy fur now clumped together with something she'd rather not even think about. Honestly, humans are disgusting!
Miles/Phoenix - 'burning to death'
"Just let me get that for you, Wright."
Edgeworth took out a lighter from his pocket and burned the stray thread away from the back of the jacket, unaware that the garment in question was made of cheap rayon and equally unaware of the giant warning label stitched into the lining. So it was quite a shock to say the least when Phoenix gave an almighty shriek and he turned to see him so resembling his namesake bird, running around the room like a motorised bonfire and flailing his arms wildly in a futile attempt to quell the blaze.
Seeing what he had done, Edgeworth quickly removed his own jacket and threw it at Phoenix, trying to smother the flames. But in his blind panic the other man knocked the coat flying with his burning arm, only managing to set it alight too and thusly the curtains upon which it landed.
The fire eventually relented (on it's own - Miles' valiant attempts at stopping it having no effect). Phoenix had collapsed to the floor long before this, but the wall of flame created by the bottle of cheap whiskey on the desk had prevented his rescue. Edgeworth approached the other lawyer to examine the damage. It was bad.
Very bad.
He reached for the phone, but only managed to dial '9' before an arm rose from the ashes on the floor and stopped him.
"Miles?"
"Yes? Are you OK? Oh my God I'm so sorry!"
"Why didn't..."
"Yes?"
"Why didn't you... just pull it off?"
Marluxia/Vexen - 'sounding'
The blood and crushed petals combined in a sickly sweet attar that covered the rose-haired man's delicate hand as he pushed, pushed against the screams of pain/pleasure, pushed regardless of the freezing pain in his shoulders as Vexen gripped, seething in agony/ecstasy as the thorny stem ran through him, slashing, shredding what lay in it's path.
"No...! Stop...please! Uhhh!"
The younger man grinned sadistically, twisting the gory remains of the flower sharply and silencing the scientist with a brutal kiss. Obviously Vexen was enjoying it - he was still as hard as the moment he entered the room. Of course, some of the plants laying around were known for their intense aphrodisiacal properties, but that was irrelevant. What mattered was that they were having fun; consent was a minor point.
The muffled cries having all but abated, he wondered what he could do next. The rose was embedded as deep as possible now; no way he could get it in further, and nothing would make him break this moment off. In a flash of inspiration he gripped tighter and pulled, tearing the blossom free in a sickening flood of gore, the blond erupting in one final scream as he collapsed to the bed.
Noticing the older man had passed out Marluxia ended the kiss, now trailing down the older man's chest seductively with his tongue, melting the frost where he'd lost control of his powers. He rested in the blood-matted nest of hair at the base of the now-limp cock. He couldn't leave it like that - such a thing could never go to waste! He tenderly lapped at the other man's groin, taking in the craze-inducing taste of blood, rose petals and Vexen's own inimitable musk. This was what he craved, what he would go to any length to get. These encounters with the man who despised him were what made his hollow mockery of an existence worth suffering.
ReDead/Link - untitled (Sarah's Birthday Fic)
Link broke from his paralysis and stared into the hollow eyesockets, felt the dead breath of the withered monster enclose his face in a sickeningly cold nebula of putrescence and dank, lonely death. Papery, desiccated skin brushed roughly against him, the creature's bony arms in a painful deathgrip around the base of his neck. From his past encounters with ReDeads, he knew what to expect - first came the hugging and the laboured breaths; next came the biting and the struggling. But this one made no move to bite - rather it pulled itself closer, drowning him deeper still in the spoiled-meat stench it exhaled and pressing it's hard, wrinkled remains against him, rubbing; up and down, up and down. And then, although it didn't seem possible, Link emitted a soft groan as the creature's movements brought blood rushing to his cock, straining the fabric at his crotch to bursting point. He reached down to free his length, raw skin rubbing deliciously against the creature's clammy body. And then the skin of it's groin gave way, and Link was engulfed in the ReDead, pounding mercilessly into it's dried out husk of a body, moaning harder still as the monster joined him, both rising and falling together as their bodies spasmed and Link came in a powerful wave of ecstasy, his release bringing long-forgotten moisture to the creature surrounding him. And with that the ReDead finally released it's grip, sinking down to it's usual slump and turning, pulling free of the hero's softening member to seek new prey.
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Date: 2007-12-02 09:29 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2010-10-01 12:37 am (UTC)